Shouted from the roof tops

There are certain kinds of secrets that should NOT remain secrets. A lot of people have a misconception that it is bad to air dirty laundry and use this as rationalization for keeping secrets that keep people sick. The best way to get better from emotional sickness is to get it out into the light where the Savior can heal. When these secrets stay hidden in the darkness, it is just feeding grounds to continue growing in sickness. Secrets are the best fertilization for emotional and spiritual demise. I learned today that the state of Utah has the highest rate of downloaded pornography. I love the gospel and I know of it's truth with all of my being, but there are some serious misconceptions in the culture of religion. I also learned that incestual families are more apt to be highly religous. Sexual abuse, sexual distortions and sexual addiction tears apart people's souls. My Grandma told me that sex is like a warm fire in the hearth on a cold night, but if it is not contained and cared for it becomes a raging fire that destroys souls and families for generations. The heart ache in our families lives has been severe. Our family has carried a HUGE HUGE burden that is not ours to carry. It's not a secret any of us want to keep. It only hurts to keep it. It does nothing good for anyone to keep it. It only enables the perpetrators and prolongs everyones pain. It is totally enabling to keep it. It is the advisary that loves skeletons in the closet. Well ha ha ha. I am a healer. When it affects me and my husband and my children, I really really enjoy skeleton hunting. I love love love to clean out closets!! I have been that way my whole life. I have been that way in my parents home in fact, my family has helped to nurture that quality in me. I am not a stuffer and I am not one to ignore the elephant in the living room. And it is not out of spite, it is out of love. It is a spiritual gift that I was sent here with. Some people in my life hate this about me. But you can guess those that do. It's the ones with skeletons in their closets. Don't get me wrong. I don't think it is right to get into other peoples business nor to air others dirty laundry that doesn't concern me. I have had some bad things happen in my life, but its amazing how when those things came out into the light and people took accountability and got better how much those devastating situations became stepping stones. But now that we are dealing with a secret that has broken the hearts of those that I care the very most about, one that no one wants to claim but only pawn off, that's when I find shouting from the roof tops quiet appropriate. We went to a spiritual healer, Dr. Fish, in Cedar City, Utah about 6 years ago seeking some healing. At that time we had no idea the magnitude of what we were seeking healing from. Dr. Fish told Mandon that he was suffering from a generational curse and that he had a split soul. We knew there was something wrong, but we really had no idea what that meant. He did not consciously remember any such thing. But something was just not right. He knew it and I knew it. It's was and still is like Mandon has multiple personalities, extreme moodiness, self sabotaging behavior, crazy borderline personality traits, severe addiction issues, sexual confusion, wow what a crazy rollar coaster ride it has been. Up and down. I know he is this amazing amazing person with this out of this world strength, but yet at other times he is like this little boy just looking for someone to love him and then other times, like this huge brat throwing the ultimate temper tantrum. Just to clarify, he reads through my blogs before I post them. We both know that he is not really a brat. It's just a symptom that comes out. He has been to psych units 3 times,  in counseling on and off almost the whole 9 years of our relationship, he's been suicidal. He has this self hatred that tormets him most of the time. It's like a a tornado tears through our home at random times. He has been diagnosed with bipolar with severe PTSD. Things trigger him all the time. I know that there is a factor of genetics that plays into some aspects of mental illness, but this is something a whole lot more. Most mental illnesses are actually unlocked by abuse. 95% of the patients at the state hospital are victims of abuse. 95%! And a whole heck of a lot more people are out there with a broken abused child inside of them that are putting on a good show to the rest of the world because they think that is what they are supposed to be doing. They don't know how to do it any differently and it seems too painful to come out into the light to heal. Slowly slowly things have started to come out. A little memory here, a little memory there. A puzzle piece here, a puzzle piece there. I love my family, ALL of my family. I love my children. I love my husband. I love my Savior. I love truth. The Savior is love, he is light, he is truth. Skeletons in the closet are none of things. The only way to cut those binding flaxin and cords is with love and light and truth. Ushering in the Savior, doesn't just mean standing there singing praises and waiting for him to heal our pain when the Heaven's open up. Ushering in the Savior for the second coming is happening NOW, we are ushering him in now by standing for truth, by cleaning out the skeletons. I came to this world to prepare to the second coming of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I am here now to Usher him in. This is what the prophets mean when they say get to work. I love it and the fire in my soul burns too strong at times to deny it! All will be made right, all that is lost will be restored. Broken spirits are healing. Family curses are being broken. This is what the Spirit of Elija means to me. The hearts of the children being turned to the hearts of the fathers. With that said, I love clean closets and I love the roof top view.